Open Adventure 2 or How We Lost It Again

After nearly two months of “thorough” training (cycling to and from work daily plus an odd run last Friday), we were going to try our luck again in adventure racing last Sunday. This time the event was taking place in North Pennines, in Hamsterley Forest. Since it is miles away from Lancaster, we had an early departure, 7.00 on Sunday morning, which none of us particularly liked. What we liked even less was the weather forecast (heavy snowing) and what we saw out there when we woke up (heavy snowing, surprisingly). Well, I am exaggerating a bit there, it was just a few snow flakes in Lancaster, but it was turning into a mild-with-a-tendency-of-bad blizzard as we were approaching our destination. So there we were, a crew of four, namely team Niksneb Nosnibor alias Pete & Clare and Big Fat Bitches alias myself & Spider, travelling northeast and moaning about the weather.
As usually, the first task was to sort out my hired bike, which fortunately wasn’t taxing this time, since the hiring shop was right near the registration point. I got a nice Merida for 17 quid and a good luck wish for free.
Before we arrived, we were all hoping that most of the people will give up because of the weather, but that is probably what everyone else was relying on, so we found the car park full of cars loaded with top range bicycles and an exquisite selection of lycra-clad men. Hmmmm. Definitely worth a look. Some of them even two:).
I slacked the preparations, but at least I’ve enhanced my gear kit, so that I did not have to ask Pete for every single bit. I bought myself a helmet and a little rucksack with a hydration system, you know, all those flashy hill walkers sucking the hoses. Anyway, not recommended for low temperatures, unless you manage to squeeze some ice out of that flashy hose. I did not.
Since by the time we made our way to the start it was snowing heavily, we decided to cycle first to avoid extra effort of cycling in deeper snow later. We decided on the approximate route and off we went, collecting the precious points. Until yesterday, I have never really cycled in snow, because at home there is either no snow, or there is so much of it, that it makes cycling impossible. Here we had some 5-6 cm of snow and more still to come from the “fluffy clouds”. Being a snow-cycling novice, I did not know how the bike would behave on this “surface”, but I learnt very quickly, my first fall was well within first few minutes, still near the start and to the great delight of both photographers, waiting to take the best shot. After they took zillions of shots of me with my limbs spread on the ground, they did not forget to ask if I was ok:)
I have to say I was quite pleased with the way the race was going, at least our navigation seemed to be much better this time and we were finding the controls rather quickly (with the aid of tyre tracks and footprints in the snow). My bike was working well, even the gear shifting was perfect, after I realised I don’t need to use full force like on my “commuting” bike. So the overall pleasure from cycling was only occasionally spoiled by skidding, blocked brake pads or iced snow blown in the face by a strong wind. Otherwise everything was fine, now I regret that I did not take in the surroundings a bit more, it was amazing, coniferous forest with giant spruces covered in freshly fallen snow, the most idyllic winter picture indeed. Alas, we did not come there to watch the beauty!
After picking up all the controls that we could we returned to the transition, had a banana, checked briefly the running route and set off. This time we only had 1 and half hour for running, which still proved more than enough to my untrained body. We met some serious competitors on the way; a guy had a girl attached to him on the rope to help her running faster! Not that we were taking it easy, but enough is enough, I did not feel like pulling Spider at all. We picked up four controls on feet and headed back to make it on time and not to get any penalties. No time for frolicking in snow whatsoever. At the end I was really digging deep, but finally we made it to the finish and it was over. We rushed to the car park to meet Niksneb Nosnibor and to the shelter to (in no particular order) have a nice cup of coffee, do a bit of bird watching and to download our dibbers, full of expectations.
I don’t need to say how disappointed we were when we found out that not only we did not beat NN, but we did not beat anybody else:(. We came last and I was overwhelmed with a mixture of feelings, a bit of pride for completing it in such conditions, a bit of shame for coming last and a great deal of curiosity what sort of superhumans were the winners with their score of 470 points! It wasn’t a happy end, but nevertheless I had a great time and good fun. One has to remind oneself that one is competing with the top of the top in the NW and to get higher up the result list one has to move one’s arse.Or alternatively, Spider suggested he could have a sex change and BFB could compete in the female pairs category (it belongs there by name anyway) where there is much less competition.

For the future here is the BFB’s vision:

- We’ll be trying hard not to get any worse results than those we got so far (it’s hardly possible)

- We’ll be working on Spider’s gender transformation

So far so good. We’ll see what the next stage brings. See you again in May!

…and by the way, link to race report and picture gallery will be provided soon, I believe some of my female readers would not like to miss lycra men on the catwalk!